Friday, August 17, 2012

Rolling With The Punches

Signs like this make me grateful to be alive. 

Yes, there is such a product and its for your you have to guess which set of lips. 

Road trip time with the homie Tooch on our way to Madison to check out behemoth beer festival that is the Great Taste of the Midwest. Set Gout to hyper speed please.

Did I mention that the weather was absolutely perfect for racism?

Stopped off at New Glarus to pick up a few specialties and take a look around the facilities. One of my favorite breweries out there. They don't take shit from anyone and produce some of the best beers around and only distribute in Wisconsin. Talk about quality control. 

The R&D sour. Only two per person and you better believe beer nerds brought a change of clothes to try and obtain more...fucking christ. 

The back patio of New Glarus. Scenes like this really make me want to live in the country side...until I think about plumbing and the beauty that is 7/11.

So they do know a thing or two about beers.


These would make awesome popcorn.

No matter what though, there'll always be a Mexican to clean. Go America! 

Always encouraging to know that doctors will take some time out of their day to pick up some good brew.

I ain't no hotel expert or anything but this can't be safe to have especially to people that may get drunk and think cooking a burrito directly on the coil may work and yes that example is pretty specific.

Pre party at Maduro in Madison. Bell's take over son. 

If you ever feel bad about your image, go to a beer party. You'll be the skinniest most attractive person there. I felt like a young Charles Bronson. 

The Old Fashioned fucking ruled. Solid beer list, nostalgic surroundings, all caucasians and fried cheese curds like a mothafucka. The walleye sammich had me jizz into that silver cup on my plate. Fucking tasty. 

You crazy.  

I dont know what to think about this as I am not really a religious man or anything but even I was a little offended by this. I mean who would serve Canadian beer in Wisconsin?

Shorts brewery and Central Waters party at Brick's BBQ. All three floors of this place had over 40 tap handles ready to annihilate your taste buds. I had a few and couldn't even distinguish between the beers. Don't get me wrong, they were good and all but after a while, just give me a High Life or a good bloody mary. 

Mandatory capitol shot. Thats a big ass titty.

When in doubt about what to eat at night, always go for the king. Even in Madison, this mahfucka represented. 

Instantly regretting last nights decision to eat deep fried chicken, I thought I'd make up for it by eating a sausage stick at the farmers market downtown. 

These were interesting...they didn't taste like mint nor chocolate but butt. 

Wisconsonians are serious about their cheese, especially when its free. 

Oh boy...the shit storm is about to begin.

Speaking of shit. 

Um cool cup collection? 

They had the best beer in my opinion. The barrel aged Kriek was something the tie dye shirt in front of me. I had a ton of Spotted Cow while I was in Madison. So fucking good these guys are.

Another favorite - these guys produce all sours. Not a huge fan of the logo, why is the horse shoe red hot?  It looks like fondant you would find on top of an awkward cake. The beers were solid though. 

This is what "beer" celebrities look like. At least John conditions his hair...its simply radiant.

I look weird in Madison. Goose had their own water station...this isn't their first rodeo.

Another cool aspect were all the random bands and singers playing throughout the grounds. I felt like I was in San Fran for a second, until I realized that they weren't all dirty drugged up crusties playing their stupid fucking banjos. 

You want to take fat to a whole new level? Get tank treads instead of the traditional wheels for support.

You couldn't ask for better weather. It was pretty amazing. It even made this grumpy Asian grateful to be alive.

New Holland zombie themed their tent. Meh, I got nothing. 

My partners in crime Matt and Tooch. Matt was ready for a corn dog while Tooch kept thinking about that bucket of Harolds.

Since beer is so healthy, why not indulge a bit with a slab of bacon on a stick? That is not my arm. Judging by that arm, its apparent dude is into cannibalism.

Check out Santa's summer package. I think dude was homeless and just happened to wake up to a beer fest.

The Two Bros. tent set up a limbo bar. Probably the best idea ever. We got to see some pretty epic wipeouts. One dude wiped out both ways. They refused to put down their beer. 

This brings back memories of getting hit as a child for watching too much TV.

Goose had a lot of room to play with and set up an academy and all kinds of cool shit. Fucking bullies of the craft beer world. All of the beers were so damn good too. The most interesting was the margarita Sofie that John was passing out behind the fort that they built. 

The owner of New Glarus showing off his 1925 bathing suit. Too much skin showing! 

Steve is amazing at passing out randomly at places. I personally think he secretly wants to get tea bagged by setting up traps like this. 

What does one drink after a long day of sampling? A nice light Totally Naked of course. 

This kid is getting huge. I may be wearing his hand me downs soon.

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